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Archive for November, 2013

Today has been fine, this evening fun, and tonight a lovely cocktail of lonely, sad, and anxiety. I’m not feeling overwhelming gratitude for anything. No sappy Veterans Day post or pretty pictures of flags. 

I am somewhere deep down grateful for gratitude. I know this year is different, iphone pictures instead of planned out effort and my Nikon, skipped posts, nothing on Flickr. I’m glad that on days like this I can be grateful for a home, job, friends, etc. Sad doesn’t have to overtake everything. 
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Salt Lake Temple October 2012
I couldn’t come up with a decent idea for a picture that didn’t require me having to involve someone else on a Sunday evening for a blog post. I wanted it to involve hands. The deacon’s hands as they pass the sacrament, to capture the comfort that comes the moment a worthy Priesthood holder lays his hands on your head sometimes before the words of the blessing are even started. I wasn’t going to bother anyone tonight though so my picture of the SLC temple from October 2012 General Conference wins.  
My family has been incredibly blessed the past few weeks because of Priesthood blessings. For me asking for a blessing takes a lot if humility and courage. When I’m at that place I am incredibly grateful that there is not a shortage of people I can call on, including phone calls placed to far away Bishops that I’ve never met before. 
When my life has been turned upside down and I could barely breath I was asked “what can I do to help?”  I had no idea, I’m not certain I even knew my name right then but I knew I needed a blessing, perhaps more than I ever had before. The blessing didn’t miraculously change anything, but among a storm of chaos and confusion about everything I thought I knew I was fully aware that my Heavenly Father loves me and knows me — including the trials and difficult times that I face. 
That is how most of my stories of Priesthood blessings go. No miracles making the warm fuzzy section of the newspaper but many tender mercies that have given me the strength and courage to keep moving forward. For that I am eternally grateful, including those who are so willing to take the time to help when called. 

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I have no picture today, couldn’t come up with one.  My job is one that I often hear “I could never do what you do!”  I love my job though, even through the gross and hard parts. The good far outweighs the bad. 

There are many more jobs out there that are best filled by people who do what they do because they love it. They believe in people that most of society has written off, they stand up and fight for individuals without any other voice. Help people again and again because they won’t give up.
Thank you for believing when society has given up, for fighting for the underdog, speaking up for the voiceless. The world is a better place because of you. 

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I have been blessed that no matter where I am in life I have had good friends as long as I let them into my life. I’ve done things within friendships that I wish I could take back and change, there are friendships that the tides of change have ended and friendships I’ve chosen to end. Some I miss greatly, some I think back on fondly, and a few I regret most of the friendship (I won’t discount how much I’ve learned and grown from those). Friends have always been there for me and I am deeply grateful for each whisper, giggle, comforting hug and late night conversation. 

Time and distance both change friendships in many ways. In elementary school cancer is what stole my best friend away from me. I look back on the sleepovers, late night giggles and the times that we just sat together because Charlet didn’t feel up to anything else and am grateful for each moment.  High school brought hours of dragging main and working on the next great prank for our seminary teacher and that all ended after graduation. Friends who wouldn’t have been a friend if they didn’t have kids in the same program where I was better known as Charlet/Michael/Kaede’s Mom than Heather. So many seasons and different friends for each.
Then came hard decisions, some chaos, hard things and difficult times and in the shake up my friends were shaken up too. Friendly acquaintances turned into rock solid support, coworkers turned into a safe harbor, people I barely knew turned into a personal cheerleading squad for when I didn’t believe in myself. When things turned difficult a few weeks ago I knew exactly where my support system was and I have doubts that they will continue to be there for me because they’ve already stood through my storm with me. 
Then this afternoon I realized how blessed I am to know there are friends who have my back. Thank you more than words can express. 

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Kaede’s Choir Program
In this community there are many ways to  watch or participate in the arts from High School band concerts to the Honors Band concert that is a combined effort between the university and the middle schools and community programs that have theater groups or the children’s choir. Speaking of which, Kaede has a concert on the 18th at 6 pm. We’d love to see you there, let me know if you want details. It would be a great FHE activity. 

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I am very grateful for the right to vote. One thing I struggle with is when people don’t vote on years like this because “it’s not a big election this year”. Really?  Maybe people out of this area won’t know who gets elected but you know what?  I know our city council, they’re more approachable and one of them I call often for various reasons and would have no problem calling him if I was wondering something or wanted to voice my opinion on a current issue.   I’ve talked about state level politics and given my support while at the pharmacy picking up prescriptions. 
Maybe it’s not a big election but this year I voted for (okay it was more against) who I did because I know them. There is no trying to weigh the bias from different media sources, there is knowing that someone is who they present themselves to be or alternatively knowing that someone will say or do whatever makes them look best at the moment. 
The RAP tax won’t cause any earthshaking media stories, but if you use and are grateful for the programs they support maybe you should go vote for it. And as long as I’m on my soapbox maybe you shouldn’t in the same breath complain about the RAP tax and be excited for the ice rink. RAP funds are a huge part of why we’re getting the rink. 
On a smaller scale I’m grateful for my neighbors right to have Christmas lights up already (yes, they are turned on) and even more grateful for my right to blog about how crazy it is to have Christmas lights on when it’s the first week of November. 
I hope you went out and voted today, at least minimally informed about what you were voting for, and I also hope you don’t yet have Christmas lights on.

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A friend just sent me this on Pinterest and it’s the perfect Kaede meme. She has an amazing perspective on just about everything. She loves easily, forgives readily, her smile can brighten the darkest day. 
Why?
She is blessed to have perspective that most do not. Several summers ago Kaede came running inside ecstatic because we are the luckiest people on our block. She pulled me outside to show me why. Our yard was full of wishes!  Aren’t they beautiful?  Aren’t we so lucky?  
Sometimes I have to directly reframe my perspective and often it takes me a while to internalize the new perspective but it does work, if only it came as easily to me as it does Kaede. Fortunately I have a good example to show me how. 
Even now if you show Kaede a picture of a dandelion and ask “what’s this?” Her answer will be “a wish”.

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